I am not sure if I should be OFFENDED by Budweiser or not? DO NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO!

Let’s be honest here…. Doesn’t everyone tell us what to do? Doesn’t it get worse every day? Especially if you are married…. Am I WRONG! 🙂 Now it is Budweiser! 🙂 Maybe I do not want to “RISE UP” and get another frosty beverage! But maybe I do! 🙂  Plus why is BUD LIGHT RED!

So I was getting a non or alcoholic beverage (I forgot 🙂 ) that said something on it today…. “RISE UP”…. What? RISE UP against the crappy service you receive at Express Car Washes? Everyone should just go to a Self Serve Car Washes right Budweiser? Okay…. Or full service. I think this is what Budweiser was saying?! 🙂

Did you guys think I was going to comment on the National Anthem thing? Like I would make a statement that Budweiser was telling temporarily rich random people to rise for the National Anthem? Please…. I just realized the NFL was still playing games. 🙂  I mean they disbanded the NBA after Jordan right?  🙂

I LOVE Watching People WORK…. I could watch it all day! Well…. not all day you probably have to be outside! :)

Greg was pulling out a Coleman Water Wizard 1.0 and installing a Water Wizard 2.0.  Greg had a couple guys up at his wash which were pretty good and you can pick up some good tips just watching people…. Or harassing people!  LOL 🙂

My tips today were not from the tech guys…. but from Greg though.  Thought I would share them.

I believe everyone has had that set of sockets in that crappy case.  When that case craps out…. What do you do?  Purchase a new SET!  🙂  Well I learned the solution for my box and tool chest drawers full of sockets. (Well it probably will be easier to just purchase a new set then put it on the holder…. Right? 🙂 )

Below is how Greg demonstrated the Ernst socket holder…. I purchased it ASAP! 🙂

Ernst 13-Inch Socket Organizer with 11 1/2-Inch Twist Lock Clips: http://amzn.to/2jTO3iz

Another tool I would never think of having but both Greg and the tech were using was an extension for your drill or impact.  I need to pick one up it will probably come in handy. http://amzn.to/2fpljgr

I tried to figure out how to unscrew something with no clearance one time and purchase this item. http://amzn.to/2y17ufM I had to use it once…. I am surprised how many times I have grabbed this silly thing. So if this is handy…. the extension is handy also. LOL 🙂

If you are looking for sockets I just picked up some deep and shallow metric sets. Both cheap…. The Tekton are nice the Stanley came in a cheap case which did not close correctly and good luck figuring out what you are looking for. 🙂 But the Stanley were pretty cheap. I have used a 500 ft/lbs impact with no problem with the Stanley impact set…. So they are good? 🙂
$18 Stanley 97-126 11 Piece 1/2-Inch Drive Metric Deep Impact Socket Set: http://amzn.to/2jVbUyw
$27 TEKTON 1/2-Inch Drive Shallow Impact Socket Set, Metric, Cr-V, 6-Point, 11 mm – 32 mm, 14-Sockets | 4817: http://amzn.to/2jU5n6Z

BTW Amazon has their NitroCat impacts on 15% off…. I got the smaller 1375-XL http://amzn.to/2wKsBCP

WHAT! You have a changer?

I had an older guy yesterday ask me for change. He said he “forgot to get change before he came to the car wash this time.” I said “No sorry…. I do not have change but you can get change from this device that can actually verify bills and give the correct change….. Every Time I just installed it! It is unbelievable!”….. Actually I just said “No sorry…. But you can get change here.”

The moral of the story should be post signs…. But does a changer really give change? 🙂 There are so many ways to say it…. I should have been keeping a list how customers ask for it. Maybe people just do not understand what a changer is?

Maybe if the changer was called a bill breaker? (I know what you elitist believe a bill breaker is! LOL 🙂 ) Or maybe a case quarter maker? But I did not have a clue what a “case quarter” was…. So maybe “Case Quarter Bill Changer”…. Or “Changer” for short…. I am glad I have single handedly come up with the standard for the industry. But let’s be honest here…. Just because I do not write free paid ads for bad magazines or do unpaid ad speeches (which I have done 🙂 ) does not mean I can not make up crap just like any stupid owner or another guy who owns or runs a crappy company. OMG…. I dare to say I am different…. I have owned a…. Wait for it…. Actually this does not matter at all if you own a car wash! LOL 🙂  Why?  Maybe not so must in the case quarter bill changer market but others.

So everyone in all industries from this day forward use the term “Changer”…. I am the most knowledgeable car wash person in this room at this time! (Actually this is a fact! No negotiating allowed…. Also the best at…. Well everything…. I am the only person in the room! LOL 🙂 )  Or you could just use something like the image above…. but of course the above image is not allowed to be used and you must pay me for my phone art!  🙂

I joke about the iphone but seriously how often do you restart it?

My wife has an iPhone 7 plus and I recommended that she should restart it every night. But she thought I was kidding…. It just seems like a buggy os / phone? Also the battery life seems bad for a new phone.

So does anyone have a restarting routine? I actually do not have one for my Android phone but I do not remember any weird problems? My wife seems to constantly complain about it.

BTW Her common problem are the lock screen and no audio on phone calls…. Could be human error! But restarting the phone always fixes the problem? Today the problem was the Bluetooth quit working and the phone claimed it was trying to connect…. Restarted the phone and the Bluetooth was actually turned off? Turned blue on and everything worked fine…. She has been complain about it for a week.

Android weird problem I have…. Same all the time. App related…. App deletes and refreshes directories incorrectly. You can wait or restart for the os to fix or refresh the problem. I should find a new app though! LOL 🙂 Stupid apple texts…. But then again they are related to a wife issue. LOL 🙂

PRO TIP: Best feature on any phone…. Fast charging! Worth upgrading your phone. It is that great!

Do you want to be a nerd? Do you want to look like a dork? I have the solution! :)

I have purchase a “real” smartwatch before…. one that retailed for over $300.  Sure it was nice I guess?  But there are only a couple features you use after the first week.
– Being waterproof
– Notifications
– Time

– Weather (I like the weather…. but it is really worthless.)
– Time between charges (> 1 day…. <1 day gets super annoying I mean I never want to use it again annoying.)

Everything else including a color display is a total waist and I dare anyone to say you play games or reply to text on your watch. (Sure canned text can work if you are hell bent to use your phone.) I did call people and text but for the first week only. I answered the phone once by saying “why would I answer the phone from that person?”…. WHOOPS! LOL 🙂 Then I turned that feature off! 🙂 I also used the watch speakerphone feature when on a ladder…. but I could just call when I get off the ladder? 🙂

Well I started looking for another “smartwatch”…. there is actually a watch that fits all my requirements. The only “issue” anyone could have is it is not touchscreen and it is epaper and not color. But it is a WATCH! It is also cheap…. well because Fitbit purchased them and now they are basically discontinuing the brand.

The Pebble 2 se cost $55.95 on amazon.com last a week with a charge, you can pick what notifies you, it counts your steps (if you are into that), you can use it for sleep also…. because it last more then one day. LASTLY it can tell the time! You can also download stupid apps and now I can check stock quotes…. my stock app on my phone always locks (still worthless right? 🙂 ) I downloaded a stopwatch and a timer…. to do stuff with! 🙂 Weather…. but I honestly do not care about the weather.

OKAY…. it does notifications, last more than 4 days and is waterproof! It wins…. Sorry it is the best! Except the Samsung cell watch which is independent and can be use in an emergency…. but they cost over $60.

YES this house scared the $%#* out of me! :)


I really like this guy and his sons…. but he asked me if I was “too scared to go to his house without a ____ man.”  I was not sure why I should be scared though? They have shoot outs, sell drugs and rob people over by my car wash…. it should be safer at his house right? I WAS WRONG! He had 4-5 WASP NESTS on his porch! WTF it was a setup! HE TRIED TO KILL ME! LOL 🙂 YES I WAS SCARED!  (I am actually allergic to wasp and passed out and got a free ride to the ER last time I got stung.)

It would have been neat to see this neighborhood back in its prime. I love old houses and these homes now. The houses are also super cool inside and they have great details no builder would do today.  Someone told me the houses are all over 100 years old?  (Which actually could be true because the “city” / mining town was created around 1880.)

(I mention back in the day because both houses next to this house are gone now…. they burnt down.  Along with others in the neighborhood.  Still very cool hood…. I also love the “downtown” aspect.  Which is basically 90% out of business unfortunately for the residents.)

I told this guy he should run for the Birmingham City Council…. it pays basically 75k from 15k I believe (part time job also) and they do not do anything for this district.  If I was a BCC loser I would actually improve the area with my actually income that the BCC is basically stealing from the people of Birmingham…. just saying.  (Sure it would be a little amount of money (75k)…. but better then nothing!)  Actually I would keep 50% because a brother has to wear stupid clothing and purchase boxing gloves.  LOL 🙂  Politics and all the media needs to just start over at all levels I believe…. I blame it on lawyers.

FREE Express Car Wash Advice from a Trained Consultant

“Trained Consultant” is a loose term…. I have no vested interest and I do not sell equipment. So technically I am better than any consultant! LOL 🙂

So this is my best advice:
1) Check the prices first…. hint it cost more than a house retard. I do not know how many times I have heard…. “I can purchase a house for less than that!” Me: “NO SH** and unless your house is a brothel or a meth lab how much does your money pit make you! NOTHING!”
1a) Check the water tap and water prices…. you might need to also factor in a reclaim system.
2) Check competition…. if another express is doing really great just build right down the street! No dumb ###…. you get the idea. You need a location with little competition. I know there are lots of stupid owners building everywhere…. in every sector but the plan is to make money correct? 🙂 Also no equipment will save you…. customers do not care only sales people.
3) This seems the stupidest to me…. do not worry about the brand name (I would prefer ss though). All the equipment washes the cars okay. Sure they wash clean cars…. but…. well so does a water hose? 🙂 You need a human to scrub the car….

Best advice ever for express customers
1) NEVER go to an express that has a “prep station”…. are you really stupid enough to clean your car before you PAY someone to wash your car?
2) ALWAYS go to an express that has some guy with a brush that knows where to wash your car before it goes through the 100-300k worth of show equipment.
2a) Back of car, mirror, bumper, fins, sun roof and pretty much any indention.
3) HINT Besides price and speed the hand wash guy does a better job and VACUUMS for you also.

This is what makes no sense to me….
If you are prepping your car (you should wash your whole car with the provided brush) and vacuuming your car. Why not just go to a SELF SERVICE CAR WASH?

Note: My wife’s car just got an express wash at a flex serve…. an employee scrubbed the front. Also when she went through the tunnel they wiped the front and mirrors. There was crap all over the sides window crevices, sun roof and back…. if you own an express you know the places. She owns a Honda van…. do not act dumb. LOL 🙂

UPDATE (BTW the above place washed the whole car like it was at a self serve. LOL 🙂 Both this place and the other place have new equipment. I also do not believe the chemical defense. Unless you are using HF on the whole car? LOL 🙂 Do not use HF or any harst chemical. It is not worth your hearth and others to wash a car.)